Middle Forks

Renée Antrosio – July 2, 2024 2 Comments

We are in the middle of the story, which is often difficult. Waiting, not knowing how it will end, at least this chapter. Individually, as a fellowship, as a community, as a nation. Somehow, remembering that we are in the middle has encouraged me. I prefer to know what is going to happen, what we should do, to act in a certain direction. But often I do not know what is best. I think one thing, but I am sometimes (!) wrong. And I am worried. Anxious for the future. Today, I was reminded (again) that it is not up to me, which was somehow freeing. 

This last week I have been listening to From Here to Equality: Reparations for Black Americans in the Twenty-First Century. After celebrating the launch of the Reparations Pilot Project, I realized I needed to review the whys and hows and try to better understand the nuances for those involved. It isn’t right for Jeff to do all the heavy lifting; we’ve got to put some effort into our own education. I’ve learned a lot, non-history major that I am.

I appreciate the authors’ creative approach to thinking about our nation’s history, that there were various points at which we could have chosen differently, for more equality, more justice, more mercy. As a nation, we are still in the middle of our story. We have choices, like Jairus did (in Sharon’s teaching: It’s the Middle of the Story) To follow Jesus, to beg him for help, to walk with Jesus, shoulder to shoulder. And, we can’t control our nation’s choices, much as we would like to. Which tempts us to despair, reminding us that we must look for hope elsewhere.

I was surprised to find unexpected heroes in our history. White men and women like me who put their lives on the line, and often lost them, for the freedom of others. There are ways to choose faithfulness even when our country does not choose righteousness. I don’t feel brave and am not enamored with martyrs, but sometimes I can step into the right choice in front of me. 

As our country celebrates freedom this 4th of July, we know that our nation’s founding did not grant freedom for all (while Britain emancipated the slaves who fought for the Loyalists.) It was one of the Roads Not Taken in the Early Years of the Republic, as chapter 4 is entitled. Deserving of the biblical lament that leads to freedom and joy. This last week’s focus on Holy Lament from the Center for Action and Contemplation seems especially appropriate. 

We are still in the middle of the story. Our own, our fellowship’s, our nation’s. May we choose to throw ourselves at Jesus’ feet, begging for healing on the behalf of those we love. May we hold our tongue while Jesus pauses to listen to other stories of pain, biting back our impatience. May we have enough faith to walk beside Jesus, to look only at him, when we are told that our dreams are dead. May we hold fast to Jesus’ words, “Don’t be afraid; just keep trusting.” (Mk 5:36) -Renée