GOOD QUESTIONS GIVE US AN OPPORTUNITY TO GROW – Part 1
This is part 1, of what will hopefully become a 3 part series from Ron Simkins, on the power of asking good questions to God. As we journey with Ron, may we find this to be a meaningful experience for further growth. And may we learn from the good questions others have brought to God throughout time. –Melissa Logsdon, NCF Associate Pastor
A BIT OF MY PERSONAL EXPERIENCE WITH QUESTIONS AND QUESTIONING
I often acknowledge that I am writing or speaking about a subject that is one of my weaker areas. Today, I acknowledge that I am writing about an area that tends to be my strong suit, although I still have plenty—I mean lots—of room to grow in it. Almost automatically I find myself raising meaningful questions about truth claims and about dominant systems. I always question the statement “All scholars, scientists, or experts agree.” On the other hand, I need to learn to be much better at remembering to ask good questions in interpersonal discussions.
A few years ago I read a book by the TV news commentator David Brooks in which he suggested that an insecure, self-protective world is a world with few questions. Likewise, an insecure, self-protective individual tends to be an individual with few questions. Brooks also suggested that this reality tended to severely diminish the potential for deeper relationships. It isn’t a great book, but it did include some helpful insights and examples. We need to learn not to fear asking good questions nor to fear being asked good questions. And, we need to remember that a good question is not necessarily a comfortable question.
Many Christians seem to think that when it comes to relating to God the opposite is true. Many consider questioning a lack of faith. That was certainly true in the Sunday Schools I grew up being forced to attend. My questions, even my completely honest ones, were often brusquely put down by the teachers. Rather than leading me toward trust in God, the result was that I found God to be less and less interesting. At that time I didn’t realize that it wasn’t God, it was my Sunday School teachers who were not very interesting—nor very interested in God or in me.
Even as I began to move toward God, many of my Bible College and Seminary professors only welcomed questions that they were comfortable with. It was only when I realized that this was coming from their fears and weaknesses that I began to be free to be authentic before God. I am still working on it.
God has proven to never be afraid of any of my questions. I have even learned that one of my gifts from God is the ability to ask questions without fear. Many of my friends speak of having been given “the gift (charisma) of faith/trusting”—that deep unquestioning certainty that God is here and at work in every situation. I envy them, but it isn’t my special gift. My special gift from God is “the gift of questioning” without losing ultimate trust in God’s goodness and involvement.
I also learned the importance of asking questions in my marriage. When I quit thinking that I knew and understood Donna, and instead began to learn to ask her honest questions about what she was thinking and feeling, we learned how to become closer. Of course, they had to be honest questions, not those questions that are really criticisms and critiques masquerading as questions. The questions needed to be those expecting ongoing dialogue to be productive. We often found that we were working from two very different stories/paradigms. This allowed us both to broaden and deepen our understanding of one another.
I have learned that questioning without fear enhances my relationship with God. And, it also encourages my willingness to interact with God through my Bible reading. God is not afraid of my questions. Even the questions that at first seem to cast doubt on God’s ability to speak to me through some parts of the Bible. Even the questions about how a Good God could possibly be involved at any level with some of the people and events in the Bible—those that nonetheless claim that God was involved at some level. There are some really dark events in the Bible. As my dear friend says, “I never had any trouble believing the Bible until I really started reading it!” Understood!
Learning that God honors these questions so long as I don’t push God away while I am asking them has been liberating and filled with growth. And, I have often learned that God and I were looking at things from two very different stories/paradigms. Honest, even very puzzled and frustrated questions, are not doubting. They are a way of seeking for truth and for more understanding. This is especially true when they are questions that I bring “to God,” as well as to friends I trust to help me seek. My questions that are asked “about God” as though God isn’t listening are not as helpful.
As I was writing this article, I had another insight. I listened to a podcast that Bob Husband did as a guest of the movie star Ryan McPartlin—“Captain Awesome.” Bob noted that asking people good honest questions shows them that you are genuinely interested in them. In doing so, it enhances the relationship, and the potentials of that relationship, in the future.
I realized that it is the same with God. Asking God our honest questions shows that we want a genuine relationship with God and opens the door for that relationship to grow in the future. Then I realized that Jesus tried to help us understand this reality: “Keep on asking, and it will keep on being given….Abba will keep on giving the Holy Spirit to those who keep on asking” (Luke 11:9-13). Asking God good honest questions leads to a deeper relationship with God, and provides more room for God to be present in our lives, even during those times when we feel snake bitten by life.
And, interestingly, asking good honest questions not only help us learn more about other people, and more about God, they also help us learn more about ourselves in the process.
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Next time–some powerful questions recorded in the Hebrew Bible. Then the third time that I write about questions, we will explore some of the questions Jesus asked. As James reminds us—“God willing.” –Ron Simkins, NCF Pastor Emeritus